84. When the prisoner is faced with a difficult choice.


   Beginning: The final stretch before the sentence is the most naive and dangerous time for the prisoner. 

 The prison stood still for a few hours, not a single prisoner’s movement was heard. Only Podolak corps patter of the feet of the captors, was ringing keychain, rattled doors. He walked around the prison – “Bear”.

   With the approaching noise of my camera on the head as if stirred hair, now, and I dreaded meeting this man. Perhaps this fear evolved from rumors of brutality and aggression “Bears”. Every time I tried to find out from friends among the jailers about the “Bear”, as each of them immediately closed and refused to say anything about it. Each employee of the prison at the word “Kosolapov”, the face became frightened and worried. So, none of them described even appearance of this person.

 (So, who is the Bear!)

 Someone came to the armored door of my cell. I felt someone watching me through the peephole. I sat on a bench at the table and tried to calmly decorate the anti-stress mantra, which recently brought me a psychologist. But his hands were trembling with fear, and his back was cold.

   For a very long time someone stood under the camera and watched me through the peephole. My nerves were on edge, I turned to the door and looked straight through the peephole. Don’t know what exactly I expressed my eyes, but inside of me was screaming, “Well, what have you, come time came!”The peephole was closed, and the rustle of feet was removed along the length from the camera. I still sat at the table and listened to the movement on the length.

   After a while, I heard the heels of longitudinal Lyudmila, it was heard as she opens the pockets on the armor in different cameras. My pocket opened.

   “Everyone, relax! Left of our building. But they’ll stay here in jail until morning. There won’t be any roads today, so go to bed and sleep!”- said longitudinal Lyudmila.

   “I hardly fall asleep today, I worry before tomorrow’s court. You want coffee? I said.

   “Thanks, I’ll have some boiling water. I’ll be there in about ten minutes. If there is a glass, then pour into it, I do not want to glow under the cameras with a mug.”- asked longitudinal.

   A few minutes later, when I gave the longitudinal glass of coffee and a pack of cigarettes “EVA”, I decided to ask her about the “Bear»:

   “Folk, and truth be told, that Kosolapov is a violent aggressor?»

   “They’re lying! Don’t believe! Yes, he is strict, but just in case! And so, very nice and cute man! Very good! Oh, if it were not for the statutory relationship, I would be with him th-th…” – sipping coffee near my camera, easily answered longitudinal, which only recently became my sympathize.

   I laughed softly and said,:

   “But I’ve never seen him before!»

   You saw him! I remember for sure that in my shift, in the summer, he came here to you with a delegation.”the jailer persuaded me.

   During the summer to me in solitary confinement came twice from the Council, but different inspectors: Arrangement of “thug house”,   Ban in the hut.

 “Really? And what does he look like externally and in what rank is he?”I said.

   “As in the song: “Ah, what was handsome, well, a real Colonel!»”- sang longitudinal Lyudmila.

   “Now I guess who it is. People, and you always in change with Olga Vasilyevna? Why was she on duty last night?”- I asked.

   “No, you’re confusing something. I told you she was sick, so I’m the only one on two floors! And yesterday it certainly would not put on duty, because its place in our shift no one to replace.”- assured me longitudinal Lyudmila.

   “I must have dreamt it last night. I replied uncertainly.

   «Dreamed. I dream about prison all the time at home, too.”- admitted longitudinal and left to do the bypass of two floors.

   So, for a glass of coffee and a pack of cigarettes, I learned a lot about the mysterious “Bear”! Now my heart was calm, I knew that the nice Colonel would not hurt me and would not allow me to ” work out “in prison or conduct experiments on me. I poured myself a Cup of hot coffee, went to the window and began to remember our first meeting with the Colonel, when the investigator conducted with me the investigation in jail (Chaos on the investigation.).

 At the moment of my recollections, in the building opposite, on the top floor in several rooms where medical offices were located light was lit. In the treatment room, which was easily visible from my cell, two goat men brought the male body and threw it on the floor. Immediately a group of men in prison uniforms came in, among them I clearly saw the warden and the Colonel in the cap. Everyone looked at the body of the man lying on the floor in a pool of blood. Outwardly, it was like hunters admiring their shot prey. Suddenly the man in the cap looked in my direction. I couldn’t move, I was paralyzed. “Cap” said something to the warden, and the whole delegation of jailers turned in my direction. I was shaking with fear. One of the jailers went to the window and, looking directly at my window, pulled the blinds in the treatment room.

   I didn’t lie down for a minute until morning. I was terrified. Every time I heard footsteps in the middle, I thought they were going to eliminate me as an unwanted witness. Before dawn the prayer song of the mule was heard from the neighboring building. I prayed with a Muslim, but only in my own language, my God. When the balander cart rattled along the length, I breathed a sigh of relief: “I survived The night.”

   Because of the Board, I never called my son last night. According to the secret law of prisoners, we were forbidden to turn on mobile phones during the “expense”. Worrying that I didn’t remind my son about the court hearing, I began to gather in court.

   When balander was putting porridge on my plate, I turned to the longitudinal:

   “Lyudmila, I’m going to court today. I’d like to ask you to forward my application to the prison office. I yesterday late in the evening wrote. I need this statement to be registered in the remand prison and “accidentally” not lost in court.»

   “Of course I’ll bring it to the office. Today is unknown, when will release home. Waiting again from the Council of superiors. Because of the accident last night.”- said longitudinal.

   “So, at night there was a justice. What kind of incident?”I asked the longitudinal one in a low voice.

   “The maniac who raped and killed small children opened veins on hands and a neck to himself this night. The person on duty, before bypassing checking, looked to the maniac, and at that from a neck the fountain of blood splashes. Until the keys ran out, and he leaned back. They say the chief’s voice broke, yelling at the attendant. Now gores all with endless inspections.”- said Lyudmila.

   «Horror. A wine maniac has already been shown or was only the result?”- I asked.  

   “The investigation went. But the Internet said that the maniac he showed the investigator the place where he buried the girl. And before the Internet wrote that the corpse of this girl dug the dog.”- thoughtfully answered longitudinal.

   “How something strange all of this. Why kill yourself if you haven’t had a trial yet.”- I answered and longitudinal also agreed with me.

   “For the time that I work, this has not happened. Sometimes some commit suicide immediately after the sentence. Okay, give me your writing, and I’ll move on.”- said Lyudmila.

   Today’s porridge-Balanda I also washed down the toilet. Hastily having had a bite of his food, I nervous tension went on the camera, waiting for me to withdraw to send to the court.

   At twelve o’clock a guard came and took me to the prison septic tank. I’ve been freezing in a cold sump for almost an hour. Someone softly knocked on the armored door and looked through the peephole.

   “Luna, are you alone here? a man’s voice asked softly.

   “Yes, one. Who are you? I asked menacingly.

   “I’m from the bathhouse attendant. You have a message from friends.”a voice whispered from behind the door.

   “Speak!”- I said quietly.

   “Today in court be silent and say nothing. They’ll explain it to you later tonight. You didn’t turn on your flashlight yesterday, and they couldn’t warn you. Your son could be in trouble after today’s trial.”- quickly rattled “Whisperer.”

   “Who exactly told you that? I cried out fearfully.

   “This was reported by the garbage through the bathhouse attendant. Someone’s coming!”a quiet voice answered.

   “What are you doing here?”I heard the gaoler’s menacing voice from behind the door.

   “I was ordered to wash the station before the arrival of the Council.”a frightened male voice replied, who a few seconds ago gave me a message from a fellow jailer.

   “Get out of here. Now we will send prisoners to the courts. You’ll be cleaning in an hour! the jailer growled.

   My heart was jumping out of my chest, my temples were pounding: “My son may be in trouble today. I have to keep quiet in court today.»

   All the way from jail to court, I prayed to God to protect my son. I was hoping my son would come to the courtroom so I could warn him of the danger.

   When I was led in handcuffs down the corridor of the court, to meet us from the office of my judges came investigator. I read everything in his eyes, from the threat he had promised to rape me with a crowd of his colleagues to the threat that hung over my son today.

   Then, when I was still under house arrest, I wrote a statement to this investigator in the RF IC about threats to me. He was suspended from my case and sent on leave until the circumstances were clarified, but not punished for abuse of authority, although his office was videotaped and there were witnesses to his behavior. Then the RF IC can use the detector to check out this investigator!

   But for some reason this investigator V., as well as his colleague, go on freedom and continue to commit the official crimes. Only inhumans can hide behind epaulets to “knock out the necessary evidence to the investigation.”

   I was taken to the courtroom. Son was not. The meeting began.

   The judge was cold and arrogantly declared that it was impossible to bring the victim CH.

 I didn’t give a damn about it, all I cared about was my son’s safety.

   The investigator sounded. And then there was silence. Neither the Prosecutor nor the lawyer had any questions to the person who initiated a criminal case against me, took testimony from the victims, put me under house arrest, threatened me with physical violence, and was later dismissed from the case.

   “The defendant, ask questions to the witness!”- rudely ordered me judge.

   “And unless my defender has no questions to this investigator?”I asked indifferently, turning to the lawyer’s back.

   “Defender, begin!”the judge grumbled.

   The lawyer bounced his ass on the chair, going through his papers. Only two questions of interest of my defender: Why witnesses become victims and why the answers these people in the interrogation of the same.

 After the spread of the answers of the investigator, the judge demanded that I asked the questions.

   “At the beginning of the meeting, I informed You, Your honor, that I was not feeling well and asked to postpone the meeting. Because of my poor health, I don’t remember what I wanted to ask this investigator.”I said, looking at the judge’s disgruntled face.

   His eyes were full of anger at me. For a few seconds we looked coldly into each other’s eyes. Then, the judge caught himself and shifting all my petitions, found the one that I asked to call this investigator. In this petition there was also an explanation on the reason of a call of this investigator. The judge read my petition out loud and addressed me:

   “The defendant, You remembered what wanted to ask the witness?»

   “I have no questions for him!”I said, looking at the floor.

   “The defendant, repeat louder what You just said? the judge’s tone was angry.

   “To witness B. I have no questions!”I said loudly.

   I didn’t look at anyone, but I felt that everyone was looking at me. A few minutes later, the judge allowed the investigator to leave the courtroom.

   After leaving the investigator, I refused to testify and at the suggestion of the judge took advantage of article 51 of the Constitution.

 

   The defence counsel addressed the judge in a satisfied voice to give him time to prepare for the debate. The defense’s motion was granted.

   Then the Prosecutor asked me to extend the measure, the defender objected, I replied: “at the discretion of the court.»

   I didn’t give a damn about anything that happened in court today. I knew they wouldn’t change my sentence.

   Now for me it was important only one thing – should I be silent to save his son.

   I felt the judge’s piercing gaze and looked at him indifferently. And in his eyes I read surprise. He rose from his chair with words:

   “The next meeting will be held in November….»

   The judge went to the wall calendar, which hung near the aquarium, next to me. Flipping through the calendar for November, he pointed to the fifth.

   “The sixth of November!”the judge declared joyfully and loudly.

   In the eyes of the judge and his impish smile, I saw disdain and arrogance to me.

   The fifth of November will be my birthday, which I will spend for the first time in prison and solitary confinement.

   When I was brought to the court septic tank for prisoners, I asked the senior escort:

   “How long before they take us to jail?»

   “I don’t know. As Your judges will give permission, and we will go. But not before two hours, when they run out of work.”- said the head of the convoy of the court.

   When the cage door clanged behind me, something broke in me. I threw up the folders with the documents, sat down on the floor with the scattered documents and cried hysterically. I cried for a long time and couldn’t stop. The guards and prisoners took turns comforting me, but I continued to sob. I could not control myself, “the spring burst inside”, my heart was torn with pain, suffering and humiliation. Someone came up, said something, asked – I didn’t care at all. When the cage door opened, the guard called me to the toilet with him.

   “They want to talk to you!”he said quietly to me.

   I thought that my countrymen came from the convoy of Pasha or Olya, so I agreed to go for the convoy. But in the dark room was only the head of the convoy. He spoke in a confused voice.:

   “What happened to You? Did someone hurt you in jail? Is someone threatening you? Why were You acting so weird in court? Tell us, we will help You.»

   Tears again flowed a stream from his eyes, and I was able to utter only a few sentences:

   “I beg You, take me urgently to prison. Please don’t torture me here! I’m tired of your trial!»

   “We can’t send You to prison in this condition. You may not realize that You need medical attention.”the convoy chief said threateningly.

   “Do whatever you want!”- I said indifferently and went out of the dressing room.

   After some time, we were loaded into the paddy wagon. I cried the whole way. Immediately from the paddy wagon I was taken to the camera. The road longitudinal told me that at the prison “walking Board”. But I didn’t care about anyone. When my back closed the reservation, I pulled out of the mattress phone, inserted a SIM card and called his son. Hearing his frightened voice, I breathed a sigh of relief.

   “Mammy, I’m sick. I have a fever and a sore throat. That’s why I couldn’t come to court.”my child said in a sick voice.

   “Can you go to your relatives for a while so that I don’t worry so much? This must be done urgently!”I asked my son.

   “Well, I’ll go to them tomorrow.”my son promised me.

   “We have now in prison justice. I’ll call you tonight.”- I said goodbye to my son and turned off the phone.

   Nervous tension did not leave me. I drank the last three Valerian pills and threw the empty records in the trash. I’ve never had a breakdown like this before. Opened pocket of the armor, and the longitudinal Svetlana asked:

   “Do you need anything from the paramedic while he’s on the floor?»

   “Yes, please call a paramedic. I need something to calm me down, or I don’t want to live. I said half jokingly.

   The prison paramedic gave me two pills of a powerful psychotropic drug. These pills I had never taken and yet decided to drink two at once. I only drank the tablets, as the door opened, and the longitudinal invited me to accompany him to the office of the Opera.

   “The psychologist wants to talk to you.”- announced by the longitudinal.

   I just didn’t want to talk to anyone.

   “What happened in court? You came crying.”- the move was announced by the psychologist.

   “I just drank psychotropic pills and I want only one thing – to sleep.”I said, displeased.

   “You’re not going to commit suicide, are you?”the psychologist asked.

   “What nonsense? Of course not! I was surprised.

   “Did you tell the attendant you didn’t want to live?”- demanded the psychologist.

   I knew my solitary confinement depended on my answer.

   «No. I didn’t say that. Possible duty incorrectly heard me or understood!”I said.

   “Don’t let me down, please! Go get some sleep. I’ll visit you tomorrow afternoon.”- the psychologist said goodbye to me.

   “Sorry, but we have such a setup to prevent any suicide. Tonight, in the men’s corps, a prisoner opened his veins, and we were all reprimanded for not paying attention to pre-suicidal symptoms.”- said longitudinal of Light.

   When we caught up with the video camera in front of my camera, I replied longitudinal:

   “Sveta, don’t worry! I’m not going to commit suicide! I have a sentence coming up, and I’ll be home soon! And now I want to sleep, tired after the trial.»

   «Nicely. Put it right on the length of the bin so we don’t Wake you up when the garbage man comes to collect garbage.”- suggested longitudinal.

   I put a bucket of garbage, and when the reservation for me was closed, lay down on the rack and instantly fell into a deep sleep. I dreamed that the longitudinal Light was sitting in the chair of my judge and requires me to confess:

   “Did You take all the Valerian pills, the defendant?»

   “Me!”- I repented and confessed to the crime.

   “So You plead guilty and are ready to bear the prison suicide strip?”- continued torture me longitudinal.

   Continuation: The sky in a cage, the prisoner with a stripe. 

  

  

  

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